Can We Talk
My prayer is that my speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that I may know how to answer every person. (Col 4:6.)
The mission of Seasoned with Salt is to offer suggestions, recommendations, advice, help, tips and encouragement from a Christian perspective. To listen or offer suggestions regarding a decision or course of conduct or action you are considering. Can we talk?
To be the person you can talk to about life, relationships, spiritual issues, questions or concerns. Do you have anger issues? Maybe you just need confirmation on what you know is right or wrong. The one who will give you a different view or opinion; a Christian point of view. Let’s Talk!
Did you know that couples who cohabitate (live together) before marriage decrease their changes of having a successful marriage? Did you know that many couples who receive premarital counseling increase their changes of having a successful marriage, because their expectations of marriage are more realistic.
Couples have a tendency to wait until their relationships are almost beyond repair to seek help. Then when they seek help they expect immediate solutions to their problems. Just as it took time for your marriage to get off course, it will take some time and effort to get your relationship back on track.
Are your children stressing you out? Do you have children that can do everything themselves,and if you say no, they have to try it. Maybe you have teenagers who think they know more than you? Maybe you are thinking you need help with your positive parenting skills. Contact me at Crystal@seasonedwithsalt.com
We are always looking for fulfilling relationships. If you have a relationship with God first, a good relationship with your family, positive relationships with friends and acquaintances, and a wise relationship with money, you are on track for a fulfilling life. Lets Talk
Do you ever ask yourself, what was I thinking? Usually after the fact. Do you sometimes say I have to something even if it’s the wrong thing? Lets talk
Contact me: Crystal@seasonedwithsalt.com
The Council for Relationships states that only strong people get therapy. Esther Schlessinger, PHd author of True Courage: Coming to Therapy stated (2011) if you are brave enough to look at yourself and admit that you could be part of the problem, that takes courage. Sometimes seeking help lets your partner know that you are interested in taking action to keep your relationship together.
Can We Talk? Crystal@seasonedwithsalt.com
Cohabitation Effect
Last modified on 2012-04-14 02:45:40 GMT. 0 comments. Top.
Cohabitation Effect: Who would have thought!
Consider the implications of living together before you move in, it’s a big deal.
In the carnal mind it would seem that if you lived with someone before marrying them that you would get to know them a little better before marriage. However in Isaiah 55:8-9 the word says for my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.
Studies indicate that there is a possible connection between premarital cohabitation (living together) and increased divorce rates and marital distress. Stanley Scott author of Sliding versus Deciding: Inertia and the Premarital Cohabitation Effect states that many people end up getting married because they were living together, not because they had actually planned on marrying the person they were living with. They slide into marriage as opposed to deciding to marry.
Cohabiting partners often do not always share the direction of their relationship. For example, the woman may think that moving in together is the next step in a relationship that will lead to marriage. The man may think he enjoys being with her right now and living together would allow him to spend more time with her. Marriage is not even a thought for him. Many people who move in together think they are leaving their options open to find someone better.
They move in with Mr/Mrs Right Now. They may end up married because life happens and they got caught up. Maybe they started having children and just decided well we might as well get married when they really did not plan on being married to Mr/Mrs Right Now.
Bottom line people end up married who normally would not have married because they were living together. The result increased marital distress and a higher divorce rate. Let’s face it if you become dissatisfied in your relationship and you are cohabiting it is more difficult to break up. There are things that have to be split up and someone has to find somewhere to live.
Single but not Free
When I meet someone, the first questions that I ask is are you married. The second question that I ask is do you live with anyone. I ask these two questions because I recognize that you can be single but not free. I believe that cohabitation does not take a person off the market, that they are still available. But for me, I have decided that a person who is cohabiting is not someone I want in my life, it’s too much trouble.
Based on the Inertia Hypothesis many people, especially men, who are cohabiting believe that they are still available as well. The articles states that cohabitation does not increase dedication or commitment. Stanley (2005) also stated that cohabitation hinders the search for a suitable mate because of over involvement with one person. Stanley (2005) described it as “moving out of the marketplace before adequately shopping.” One problem with living with someone and trying to date or find someone else is the drama involved. It is like sneaking around and cheating and you are not even married.
I call living together being single but not free. I agree you are single, but you still have to sneak around like you are married. If you think you are leaving your options open, what will happen if you meet someone who is really single and wants a real relationship.
If you are cohabitating you have to figure out how to work things out. If they don’t allow you to move in with them, then you have to find somewhere to live. That is a lot of trouble. That is not really leaving your options open. That is single but not free.
Contact me at Crystal@seasonedwithsalt.com
Let’s Talk Encouragement
Last modified on 2012-04-14 02:50:01 GMT. 0 comments. Top.
Lets Talk- Encouragement
Sometimes life gets complicated, things go wrong, and sometimes we just sweat the small stuff. We need to be encouraged. We are not always able to encourage ourselves, we need help. One of the reasons for Seasoned with Salt is to offer encouragement. Many times when I offer encouragement to others, I encourage myself.
When we read about people in the bible, sometimes we don’t understand how these people could be so fragile in their belief, in their faith. We think, how could they fall back into their old ways, into fear, or just get tired of waiting, after the things that God had done for them. Why are they not encouraging themselves in the things that God has already done.
We have relationships with God, we have experienced God. He has delivered us from people and situations that held us in bondage. He has opened doors for us, promoted us and healed us. He has shown people that our God is God. But yet, we still sometimes need encouragement.
We get caught up in what other people think. We get swayed by people in relationship with us. We run away from God. We get tired of waiting. Sometimes saying, I have to do something even if it is the wrong thing. Why aren’t we encouraging ourselves in the things God has done ?
So, the next time you need encouragement, allow Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego to encourage you. They told the king, our God who we serve is able to deliver us from the fiery furnace and He will deliver us out of your hand.
Let Noah encourage you, who saw no rain and no clouds but continued to build an ark. He did not see any signs of change but was encouraged by his God to follow instructions.
Allow Daniel to encourage you because he believed in his God and there was no hurt found on him when he was delivered from the Lions den.
Let Hannah, Samuels mother offer encouragement when she vowed a vow to God if He would give her a son, she would give him back to God. God blessed Hannah with a son and she fulfilled her vow. Then God blessed her with five more children
Allow Jesus to encourage you.
Be encouraged by Lazarus who Jesus called forth from the grave. Be encouraged by the man at the pool who had no one to help him when the water moved, but Jesus healed him. Encourage yourself with the woman with the issue of blood who just needed to touch the hem of Jesus garment. I don’t know in what area you need encourgement, but I know someone in the word of God has an encouraging word for you.
Think about yourself or fellow Christians and ask if God seems to take too long to show up in your life, what will you do? Will you encourage yourself in the word of God? Will you be able to offer encouragement to someone else
Be like David who found himself greatly distressed, but encouraged himself in the LORD his God. Remember who you are in relationship with, the Most High God, the Holy One of Israel and Be Encouraged NOW